Breastfeeding and sleep - is it possible?

I was at a La Leche League meeting this week and one of the mom's brought a question forth to the group: as a result of her son's sleeping habits, she now co-slept and breastfed at night freely. The trouble was, when she tried to remove her breast from his mouth once he was asleep, he would wake up and instantly start hunting for the breast and wake up.

Around the room, many moms offered their advice, "Have you tried....", "What I used to do...", on and on around the room.

It got me thinking - if all the moms in the room had experienced this "problem" at some point in their breastfeeding relationship, why are we so quick to deem it a "problem" that needs to be fixed?

When I go online to different mommy chat groups you hear the same questions asked over and over through the years: "I can't get my newborn baby to sleep anywhere but on my chest", "my baby is biting me instead of nursing", "my baby seems too distracted to breastfeed" - nothing is unique, many babies experience the same situations.

I have always had a big issue with sleep training. Yes, I have heard that a rested mom is a happy mom and that makes for a happy family...thing is, I'm not buying it because, when I look at these situations and see so many children experiencing them over and over, it makes me think that perhaps there is a reason.

Children are born with the innate ability to do what they have to do to feel comforted and fed. They can't change their own diapers, but every single baby in the world will cry if they are left in a soiled diaper too long, or if they can't find the breast (or bottle) for milk. So if every baby in the world goes through similar stages, why are we so quick to jump in and fix it? Why must babies sleep through the night? Is that natural when breastmilk only lasts in their system 2 hours, formula only 4?When toddlers hit the 'terrible 2's' society is quick to brush off misbehaviour as a consequence of age, so why can't the same be said for newborn babies? Is it so hard to believe that it is (dare I say) normal for a mom and baby to co-sleep and nurse all night long because the baby and mom both seem better rested in this arrangement (why do you think the mom and baby co-slept in the first place?) Not only is easier for them, but it is more comforting - and that is all baby wants!

Breastfed babies are, however, capable of sleeping through the night. I suspect this has more to do with other factors: their personalities or even their birth order.

Lets look at an example: Noah was up every 2 hours until I returned to work and was physicially incapable of waking every other hour to breastfeed him at 14 months of age (at which point we were able to wean his night feeds because I couldn't function and he was a 30lb toddler). He used to nap with my breast in his mouth for hours and hours. He slept in my arms and nursed as soon as he woke at night. Conversely Layla, being the second born, had to learn to put herself to sleep at times out of necessity. With a 2 year old on the main level of the house, it was hard to lay with her for hours and nurse her constantly. It was hard to have that time so she is actually a fantastic sleeper now. Similarily, she doesn't wake up at night, despite being a breastfed baby. I think it is just her personality....

So to all new moms: do what works. There is usally an innate reason why baby sleeps better on (or with) you, why she nurses constantly, and why she wakes every two hours. yes, it is exhausting (but that is why motherhood is so hard) - take heart, it won't last forever. I don't know of any teenagers who still need to nurse to sleep on their mothers chest. They grow so fast, and soon you will long for those quiet moments of cuddles together.

These are horrible photos of me, but I wanted to share anyway!

Co-sleeping with Noah