Tales from the other side of the stethoscope: All about Layla

Layla was a surprise pregnancy...the result of two people believing themselves to be infertile! At the time I got pregnant, Noah was 14 months old, I had just returned to work and was finishing up my Master's degree. We always said if we somehow conceived on our own it would be a wonderful blessing. This is how Layla Grace came into our lives.

The day I found out I was pregnant, I had gone to work with a suspicion that I was pregnant. I went to a drug store on the way into work and grabbed a test. Keith and Noah had an appointment at Sick Kids, so I knew they were going to meet me afterwards. I went out to meet them and couldn’t keep it in, “I’m pregnant”. Keith looked as shocked as a human could look! He just stared at me. Part of his shock is largely due to the fact that a few weeks before, we had sat down and had a serious discussion about when to return to the fertility clinic. We were trying to time it around Noah’s age, the end of my Master’s program, finding a new job and saving money before going back onto maternity leave. Life had other plans.

Layla's pregnancy was very easy and very different from Noah's. Keith and I just knew that it was going to be a healthy pregnancy and it was - short of taking a fall on ice at work one day!

Layla was supposed to be named "Grace Elizabeth" as we had that name picked out for a long time. "Grace" was picked because I liked it, more so than the meaning. "Elizabeth" was after Keith's grandmother. However, one day Keith came home and said that he thought Grace was too common lately and after naming Noah (whose name is in the top 5 names right now), we didn't want to have the same problems we are encountering with Noah at daycare (there are three Noah's in his small class right now!). He met a little girl at Noah's gym class named Layla and said how much he liked the name. Once he was into changing her name, I searched high and low for other names but he hated them all because in his mind, she was his little Layla already. Of course, since choosing this name, I have heard of three new babies named Layla and haven't heard of a single Grace...so who knows. We chose to use the name Grace as a middle name and for some reason, I can't stop calling her Layla Grace - rather than just Layla. Keith loves to call her L.G. and Noah...well Noah likes to call her "baby".

Layla was born a month before Noah's second birthday. Her birth story is actually quite humourous - many of you have read it already but I will post it here too because I think it was an amusing situation.

So far Layla is very healthy. She is a big baby - off the charts in all respects, but she definitely has a different personality than Noah. She is my "spirited child". She knows what she wants and when she doesn't get it - watch out! She has developed a disturbing deep and husky growl when she is frustrated - it is hilarious to hear. She is a great sleeper but her naps have always been a challenge. Worry about naps consumes so much of my time I am sure it will get it's own blog post.

Layla and Noah are opposites in every way thus far:

Noah ate all day long when he nursed; Layla is in-and-out in 10 min's
Noah was quiet; Layla is very vocal
We never had to baby proof with Noah - he just was told not to do something and he wouldn't...I have already caught Layla chewing through cords (time to baby proof!)
You could leave Noah to amuse himself; If Layla doesn't have constant attention she is furious!

I find it very hard not to compare them. I want them to each be their own person without comparison, but I think it is just natural to compare. Layla is more of a needy baby who, at times, makes me question my desire to have more kids! Yet, she isn't a fussy or colicky baby - she is just very demanding of time and attention. It is because of her spirited nature that she is also one of the most loving and fascinating babies I have ever met (of course, I have a slight bias here). Her smile is so infectious, she can make a whole room smile and stop talking to stare at her (believe me - I have seen this happen at my weekly Weight Watcher meetings). She really is a wonderful baby!

I think the biggest challenge we will encounter raising Layla, is helping her grow up without resentment for Noah's ailments and the attention they inevitably receive: good or bad, attention is attention - and I fear that it may have repercussions on her childhood and her relationship with her brother. I have witnessed this first hand at the bedside, and I have no idea how to avoid it. We try to treat Noah as normally as we can, however on some level we will always baby him a bit, even if we don't try to - when you go through what we did with your child, it is hard not to baby them!

Conversely, we feel that Noah's health issues have given us a unique perspective when it comes to appreciating the children and enjoying every minute of their lives.

Layla is still sleeping in our room - we moved her crib beside my bed when she outgrew the playpen. Thank goodness we have a huge room and can't afford to properly furnish it! So our next job is to get her into her own room. Right now I am working on getting her naps in the crib. Currently we either co-nap, or I nurse her to sleep on our bed and leave her there. I am day 4 into this experiment and so far she is doing ok. Every now and then she stays on our bed, but I am really trying to help her learn to nap in her crib.

Layla has also started solids. She loves them some days, hates them on others...it really depends on her mood. As I said, she is spirited!

Anyway, here is her shortened birth story (also posted on FB), and I am going to post photos after it of our gorgeous blue eyed girl!

Layla's Birth Story

April 17th, 9pm: Keith and I are watching TV and I keep getting intermittent pains. They were quite uncomfortable, so I tell Keith and go upstairs to have a shower to make them go away. I feel much better after the shower, but when I get downstairs, Keith is clutching the phone. We then proceed to argue about whether or not I am in labour or if I just have gas! He wanted to call his mom to come up because she had a long drive, but I wanted to wait because I really didn’t feel it was labour (I was, after all, a few days early!). We argue all until bedtime, at 10pm. I tell him that he can’t call his mom and if I do in fact go into labour that night, he is not to say, “I told you so”.

10:20pm: We shut out the light, and I get a contraction. To tell if it is a Braxton hicks contraction or not, I decide to get up out of bed and walk it off – as soon as I get up, my water breaks! I run to the bathroom yelling, “Call your mom!”.

I can hear him on the phone with his mom: “It’s go time! Her water broke……Yes…..come now…..Her water broke!.....HER WATER BROKE!” (clearly it took a few tries to get the message across)

My contractions never really kicked in, so I go to bed. I was up every 15 min's with contractions, but they didn't get any stronger or closer together...just more annoying than painful.

April 18th, 6am: I get up with Noah and my mother-in-law is shocked to see us still at the house. My contractions are getting further apart so I call triage, who tell me to call the OB on call (who just happens to be my own OB). She suggests I go to the hospital (but don’t rush there), where she promises she won’t send me home because too much time has passed since my water broke the night before.

8am: We arrive at the hospital. We are the only ones in triage so we are seen immediately. The nurse hooks me up to the fetal monitor and leaves us to our own devices. I nap off and on, since I didn’t sleep well the night before. Finally a doctor comes to see us around 10am (I had missed my own OB who went off-call by 7am). She said they will admit me but I ask her to check me. She didn’t want to, but I insisted – I am 3cm dilated at this point.

10am: Keith and I walk the halls and I try the exercise ball to get labour going, but contractions totally stopped by now. The nurse asks me if I will want an epidural – she anticipated my labour would come on hard and fast with the pitocin because I had a fast labour with Noah. She suggested it might be easier and better to do the epidural before the pitocin – I agree. So we spend the next hour waiting around for the anaesthetist to do the epidural.

11:30: Got the epidural - I felt like such a weakling getting an epidural before I had any real contractions, but with Noah’s birth, the epidural didn’t take, so I knew what labour felt like and I wasn’t eager to feel it again! The doctor assured me many people do it this way and made me feel less stupid for asking for it so early.

I did not like how I felt once I had the epidural. I felt faint and nauseated from being numb. It wasn’t related to my blood pressure, which was fine. It was all in my head – I couldn’t get past how awful it felt to have numb legs and bum. I think because I didn’t relish the relief an epidural can bring when in active labour – I basically got it with no pain at all – so it really felt weird to me.

12:45: Started the oxytocin

13:15: Contractions 4-6 min’s apart, increasing in strength. I didn’t feel a thing so I napped a bit off an on.

15:19: Contractions 2.5 min’s apart. Starting to shiver – likely in transition at this point. The nurse kept increasing my drip because my body would react well initially but then it would seem to get used to the level of drugs and slow down again.

15:30: Increased my pitocin again.

16:15: I had asked the nurse if they could check me because I was shivering but couldn’t feel an urge to push. I had been on the drip for about 3.5 hours and I wasn’t convinced I would feel the need to push. They told me I would but I had convinced them to check me anyway. Lo and behold – I am 10cm! Who knows how long I was 10cm for because I really couldn’t feel a thing. My bum was very numb.

All of a sudden I am VERY nervous. I didn’t feel any pain with the labour and I didn’t have the urge to push so the thought of just pushing with no urge, made me scared. So I begged the doctors and nurse to take their time setting up, so I could calm down a bit. I start shivering big time but this time it is related to my nerves. I did however, have another nap as the doctors tended to another labour (at my request).

17:23: I can feel the contractions enough now to know when to push. I pushed three times with each contraction, despite feeling quite ill with each contraction. After 2 contractions they had to call the doctors because her head was right there. I didn’t really realize how close it was because I didn’t feel a thing!

The nurse called in the resident, fellow and staff into our closet of a room, and I begged them not stretch me to accommodate the head – they all laughed. Then I told the nurse that if I threaten to punch her, not to take it seriously.

I push once and I hear “STOP!”. I stop and ask “WHY? What is going on down there?’. They laughed and said “The head it out!”. I am shocked because I really didn’t feel it! (I should point out that Layla's head remains, to this day, enormous! At 33 weeks, her head was the size of a full-term infant)

Then I push one more time and out she came flying! I had pushed for 9 min’s – most of which was waiting around for contractions or doctors! All in all it was 3 contractions.

Layla Grace was born at 17:32 – 4.75 hours after being induced.

Here are photos of our beautiful Layla Grace: